Well, as everyone probably knows by now, Terri Schindler has passed away. After being starved and dehydrated to death. Something we wouldn't even do to our worst death row inmates. Even they get a last meal! So while Terri is finally in Heaven, here on Earth we will have to deal with the ramifications this means for disabled and handicapped people. When we go to my sister's house (my codename for the [url=http://www.hattielarlham.org/...]Hattie Larlham Foundation[/url] ), I will be looking at all of the kids that live there, and wondering if the government would have the heart to starve them to death. Or maybe the next time my sister has a grand mal seizure, if they won't try to stop it. Not many people are directly affected by Terri's passing ... ::sighs:: This is a disgusting country we live in. Sure, people starve and are dehydrated to death everyday over in Africa, and that puts some things into perspective ... well, I'm going to go now, reflect this with my mom. Ciao. :idea:

Welp, I'm bored waiting for Mike to get his booty over here and pick me up, so I scanned a couple old pictures from my childhood. Enjoy! (I'm gonna make these links so my blog doesn't take forever to load for me ... I'm runnin on a slow modem ... )

My dad always wanted a son, so he tried to teach me to be a mechanic X( And that's not a beer bottle, it's Diet Coke! :roll: One good thing about my dad - he wasn't an alcoholic. Haha that's when we lived in Cleveland ... drove through there within the past year ... homeless people pushing shopping carts in that area now :'( http://img.photobucket.com/al...

This was a cake from 5 or under ... it says Happy Birthday, Heidi ... and has daffodils or buttercups or whatever ... then it has this random computer decoration on it! Flowers and computers, that's all I need. http://img.photobucket.com/al...

I am the almighty syrup monster!!!: http://img.photobucket.com/al...

My goofy dad when we were in Canada when I was 4 or so : http://img.photobucket.com/al...

I stole this quiz from someone who said she stole it from someone else X(

I am a Breakout Bat. I am an abstract sort of creature, who dislikes any sort of restraint. If you try to pigeonhole me, I'll break the box, and come back for more. I don't have any particular ambitions, I just drift, but I am adept at keeping life going along. What Video Game Character Are You?

A cywydd llosgyrnog; I'm one. "A what?" Well, quite. There'd be no fun In being understood; I Thrive upon obliquity. Don't comprehend or follow me, For mystery's my ally. What Poetry Form Are You?

I am a Redhat. I'm too much of a geek to be a genuine hat of any sort. I was hoping my result would be 'white-hat' or 'black-hat', and am disappointed that those results weren't even available. I probably think the cup-holder story is funny. What Sort of Hat Are You?

Cor blimey, I taste like Tea. I am a subtle flavour, quiet and polite, gentle, almost ambient. My presence in crowds will often go unnoticed. Best not to spill me on your clothes though, I can leave a nasty stain. What Flavour Are You?

Yay! Mike came in and visited me at work tonight. Tomorrow we're going to the Akron Zoo, to Fairlawn for some EB Games, and to eat at Olive Garden. I've never eaten there before so this will be exciting. He's gonna apply for a job at the Post Office and hopefully he'll get it. Great benefits o_o

Dang ... I just finished talking to Lee, and as you can probably tell, we work at the same place and she's my best friend. Well, we were complaining about our manager and her immature/irresponsible behavior lately ... and today I noticed that she had changed her address in the computer ... and it turns out she's getting a divorce. My manager is really nice, but in my opinion ... she's a little wild. I know I'm really .. straight edge in that I don't drink or do drugs, but she sounds like she could really party and doesn't see anything wrong with either of those things. But when I got hired in about a year and a half ago, she was really Christian-y and went to church all the time ... she seems like a completely different person now. I find it hard to get along with people who are wild, because they tend to be outspoken and attention seekers. Nothing drives me more nuts than people who are arrogant, self centered, and drama queens/kings. But anyway, I feel kinda bad now ... but she always told me after I broke up with my ex, how much she looked up to me because I broke up with someone I wasn't happy with to be with someone who would make me happy. So now I see she's really following through on that ... hehe maybe I was an inspiration to her 8) Hehe, no, but she does have a 13 year old son ... it seems like her and her husband, unless one of them did something crazy awful, would try their best to make things easy on their son. It seems like everyone's parents are divorced these days ... I know that's one thing I never want to go through or put my kid through - my mom has been married 4 times (first dude I never met) and ... I can't even imagine that. I know I could marry Mike and be happy for the rest of my life. I know he feels the same way about never wanting to get divorced from whoever he marries, so we will take things slow ... he was so sweet and brought me food at work ... he's so considerate of me and like tomorrow, when he was telling me what we're gonna do, he's like "Well, I'm gonna take ya to the zoo, and then to Olive Garden." I didn't even plan any of it, he just announces it, and it's fun when it's that way, because he knows I wanted to go to the zoo, and remembered me saying around Valentine's Day that I'd never been to Olive Garden. I also told him when he goes to Texas that he has to send me a postcard at least every other day :D

Well, I'm supposed to be getting up in about 5 hours so I guess I better hit the sack. Ciao. :idea:

Bleh. I need to pluck my eyebrows again. Such a painful thing to do but they're a little out of control if I don't X( And maybe it's sexist but I think most women should pluck their eyebrows. Just looks better. One of the biggest turn offs (if they can be called turn offs when it pertains to other women) about a woman's looks is if their eyebrows are too dark and/or thick. Especially if they're a natural brunette and dye their hair blonde, lol. I wanted to dye my eyebrows to match my hair when I dyed it red, but my mom told me not to. Oh well, it didn't look awful.

Ack! As I've mentioned Mike breeds dogs. Recently, his pugs, chinese cresteds, and dachsunds had puppies. Check out these adorable pics! The chinese crested that is looking at the camera in both is my favorite pup, but he sold it today. I asked him to take pictures of it if it sold before I got to see it again.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/redmercur y685/cutedog1.jpg" title="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/redmercur y685/cutedog1.jpg" target="_blank"http://img.photobucket.com/al...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/redmercur y685/cutedog2.jpg" title="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/redmercur y685/cutedog2.jpg" target="_blank"http://img.photobucket.com/al...

YES! I was away from the computer for a few moments and when I came back David was online! I hate to make it seem like all I wanted to talk to him for was his skill in computers, but he's the only person that could help me, lol. And he's coming over tonight or tomorrow night with his girlfriend (finally got with this chick!) to take a look at my computer! Also got some giant frigging monitors to give as collateral for his mad skillz, hehe. Phew! And it'll be nice because we don't really get to chat much and I'll get to meet his gf. :)

Argh, I was gonna say this in my last post. I picked up Paper Mario which I haven't done since we've been at the cabin, I finally get to a save point, then I have to go through this REALLY hard part .. and afterwards I was so thrilled I made it through without dying too much, and of course I DIE right after I get out! And the save point was right before the hard part so I have to do it all over again :evil:

Okay, well I am going for real this time. Ciao. :idea:

P.S. This is the Air song I got my username from ... I bought "Talkie Walkie" on Mike & me's first 'date' on 11/19 ... we listened to it and this song defined how I felt about him for a long time ... except he's a boy, lol ...

[b]"Cherry Blossom Girl"[/b] by Air
I don't want to be shy
Can't stand it anymore
I just want to say 'Hi'
To the one I love
Cherry blossom girl

I feel sick all day long
From not being with you
I just want to go out
Ever night for a ride
Cherry blossom girl

Tell me why can't it be true

I never talk to you
People say that I should
I can pray everyday
For the moment to come
Cherry blossom girl

I just want to be sure
When I will come to you
Winter time will be gone
You will be by my side
Cherry Blossom Girl

Tell me why can't it be true

I'll never love again
Can I say that to you
Will you run away
If I try to be true
Cherry blossom girl

Cherry blossom girl
I'll always be there for you
That means no time to waste
Better take the chance
Cherry blossom girl

Tell me why can't it be true

There's something to be said to being forcefully pulled away from the computer, lol. Since I can only come online when my mom and stepdad aren't home, I'm actually getting a decent night's sleep and having good talks with Mike on the phone. 'Course I miss talking to Lee and everyone online, but kinda made me realize how trivial most of the stuff I do online is. :?

Tomorrow is me and Mike's 4 month anniversary; and I probably won't be online again until Monday. Tonight me, Lee, and Cole are gonna hang out; maybe go see that "Robots" movie or something. Mike's crew is supposed to be over his house so we're all just busy bees tonight O:-)

I can't believe the cabin is coming up so fast! I've made a list of all the stuff I need to take. We're leaving Wednesday, probably around 3 - 4 pm to go shopping for groceries, and heading down to Coshocton after that. Cole and Lee may do their shopping ahead of time, but who knows. We get to stay down there until at least Saturday night ... it's so great, when we were there in January the weather was kinda shitty, but we had a great time just playing board/video games, lol, gambling, spending ... quality time together, hehe :roll: We've been really lucky when it comes to 'quality time'; at the end of January his mom and stepdad were gone for an entire week down in South Carolina and I only left the house because I had to work X( Nice to know we can be together all that time and not get on each other's nerves, hehe :)

For the past couple weeks I've been putting aside lots of money to save ... for the West Virginia trip in June ... Cedar Point this summer, whenever we do that, and of course for Hawaii in the winter!!! I just can't get over that I'm actually going to Hawaii. I gotta pay for a good chunk of it, but that's to be expected. I remember being told about it in January, and it's already almost April now ... the time is just gonna fly by :D

Argh! Something that gets on my nerves: The Sims (not sure if it's because it has the Livin Large expansion pack) on Mike's laptop is capable of creating houses with two floors! It's AWESOME! But why couldn't they put that on the console versions? I'm gonna rent the Sims 2 to take with us down to the cabin, and am gonna be peeved if it doesn't rock the socks off the PC version. Also gonna be lots of fun to be able to play X-Men Legends with 4 people! I wish Cole and Lee had GBAs so we could all play Four Swords ... rofl, that would last for about 15 minutes probably ...

Maybe tonight I'll ask Lee and Cole if they wanna go shopping for some 'extra' stuff to take to the cabin. I haven't bought any new bedroom apparel in a couple months and this would be the perfect opportunity :D Unless Mike wants to help me pick it out tomorrow night :lol:

Tomorrow night we're gonna go up to the Exchange, EB Games, and Funcoland ... here's a list of stuffs I need/want to buy X(

Orgy CDs
Fiona Apple CDs
Tool CDs
Air CDs (they actually had "Talkie Walkie"; figures I bought it for twice the price they had it at months ago ... but it came with a DVD :wink:)
Greg the Bunny DVD set
The older Evanescence stuff since Lee doesn't have it
1080º Avalanche
A used NINTENDO memory card (1019)
That relatively new Carmen Sandiego game

Or maybe rent that Carmen Sandiego game and the Sims 2 for X-Box so Mike can uh ... have it ... he has a special X-Box :roll:

Well, I gotta work this morning, so I don't wanna waste my time blabbering on here. See y'all on Monday :idea:

I just have to throw this in before I go to bed! The reason my images are of poor quality is because for some reason, my computer refused to upload anything over 6k. Well, I got rid of tons of spyware, am using Mozilla Firefox instead of Internet Explorer, and now I can upload bigger images!!!! This rocks!!! I can upload more of my drawings and better pictures of anything! I even made a new, less shitty header! Whaddya think :roll:

Well, now I really am off to bed because I gotta go to my sister's house kinda early tomorrow/today :? Ciao. :idea:

Mike was feeling all yucky tonight again! This sucks! What the hell is this weird bug that's not the flu that's going around?? :evil: Course I made him feel better 8) Nurse Heidi, that is ... :lol:

Got up REALLY late today, like 3:30 pm :oops: Had that doctor's appointment at 6. He gave me some meds to try out because apparently I have irritable bowel syndrome :? Not denying it, hopefully it'll help. I think it's all the crap I eat, but we'll see ...

Hung out with Mike tonight, which was mostly me playing the Sims, hehe. He was feeling so blah! It made me so sad to see him all achey and tired and I gave him this big long body rub ... I hope he feels better tomorrow and definitely by Friday when he has to go back to school :cry:

Here's what I ate today, 'fore I forget:
1 can of sprite
1 glass of water
2/3 of a 99 cent bag of pretzels
1 44 oz diet coke pop X( (lots of ice!)
2 pieces of refrigerated pizza
1 glass of some cherry vanilla dr. pepper
1 32 oz thing of orange Powerade

At the doctors today with my coat and everything on it said I weighed 155 lbs :cry: :cry: :cry: Mike's said with hardly any clothing on that I weighed 150 :( So ... yeah. This is so depressing. I know I need to lose the weight, but the fact is, I just don't have a lot of motivation to exercise, and the weather is shitty. It'll be nice to go somewhere and ride my bike once it warms up, but until then, I'm stuck v.v

Well, it's like 5 am and I gotta get up around 12:30 pm at the latest ... so ciao. :idea:

Another uneventful day. Here's what I ate:

2 bananas
1 bowl of marshmallow mateys
Approx. 3 cups of 2% milk
2 bowl/plate thingies of egg noodles w/pasta toss
1 chocolate chip cookie
1 small bag of cheddar cheese pretzel combos
1 can of sprite

Ehh ... with returning health comes 150% hunger :cry:

Mike's feeling a little under the weather tonight, so tomorrow we're just gonna order pizza, watch "Thinner" (I just finished the book the other day) and play some more X-Men Legends probably. I gotta do my taxes, open a bank account, and go to the doctor tomorrow for a check up after being at the ER Saturday night. Blehhh, more money that I do NOT have ...

Watched "Bridget Jones' Diary" today. Movie was kinda depressing. Way too predictable. "The Incredibles" comes out March 15! I loved that movie! I get to rent it a few days early since I work at the video store :D

Well, I don't really have a lot to say, except I'm frigging TICKED because I went to play the Sims: Bustin' Out without a memory card, and I figured it would just tell me I wouldn't be able to save without one, but it wouldn't even let me play! I just wanted to build a house and I couldn't do anything. I hate EA Games :evil: Challenge those bastards myself ...

I'm gonna go talk to Lee now because we haven't had a chance to converse much lately. Ciao. :idea:

Today was pretty ho hum. I'll list what I ate first so I don't forget.

Menu for 3/7:
Banana
About 2/3 2 liter of Diet Coke :
2 original soft tacos from Taco Bell
4 Archway soft sugar cookies (again)
2 chicken breasts I think ... one white, one dark
A small chocolate bunny
Some water

I weighed myself at my grandma's yesterday and it said I went down 5 lbs! Same at Mike's today! Both scales are off though; my grandma's said I was at 145 and Mike's said I was at 149. So who knows which one is correct. Either way, they both read 5 lbs + that last time. I'm really happy. Drinking a lot more water is helping me lose weight a little at a time. I like being curvy, but I reallly was starting to push it into being fat X(

Played some X-Men Legends again tonight; almost got Gambit!!! Me and Mike's favorite character. Ironically it was also my ex Nick's favorite X-Man too. :roll:

But literally ... not much happened. It was really windy and stormy/rainy this evening but it slowed down significantly. Starting to snow now -_- Tired of winter!!! If it's not going to be pretty and snowy outside like Christmas, it just needs to stop all together :evil:

I talked to my ex again today too for the first time in a while since we started arguing with each other. Which is good. I don't want to be mad at him forever, and it's so much easier to just be sometimes friends than total enemies. Don't want to burn any bridges is all. Plus, we frequent Gaia a lot and we like to talk about it since we got a lot of stuff on there :roll:

Watched "Icons" tonight on G4 and they had the dude from Bullfrog/EA/name-of-his-c urrent-company! The dude who did Black & White, Theme Park, and Theme Hospital, etc .. he's a real gaming genius. Even stepped down from his vice presidential position at EA to go back to being a game designer because that was his true passion. I'd love to be creative and innovative like that. Game design would be such a fun job, but I'd rather play 'em than design 'em :roll:

Welp, off to play some Sims and watch "Voices of a Distant Star" here in a few. Ciao. :idea:

It seems like EVERYONE has had some bug of some sort recently. I am not excluded. :?

Last night, went over Mike's house around 4, played Imaginiff (great board game!) tried a game called TriBond (shitty and difficult board game), and played that Family Feud DVD game I mentioned the other day. Ended up getting my money back for that turd of a game. :roll:

When Jerome arrived, we went out to Wadsworth to the Country Cafe; a little after 8 pm. Ate some good eggs, bacon, and toast, went to Wal-Mart (to take that game back) and went back to Mike's, arriving around 10:30 or so. Well ... last year I had a medical problem that I don't think anyone really wants to hear about. Let's just say it involves blood in a place there shouldn't be any. So I get all frantic and have Mike take me to the ER. Ugh ... threw up while I was waiting; I was SO nervous. I always think the worst thing! Could be bleeding internally and not even know it. But they told me I had the same thing as before, and to eat better, etc. One thing is for sure, I am not drinking ANYMORE pop, I drank a little pop on Saturday for the first time in a few days, and BAM. But it was sooo nice; Mike stayed with me the entire time. He held my hand and reassured me and everything. Not that he really had much choice, but you know :roll: When I was laying there in that stupid hospital gown, I thought all of a sudden "I wonder if this is what it'll be like when I'm pregnant?" :shock: Having him next to me and all that ... :oops:

But anyhoo, went back to his house after that because that's actually the first time I've been to the ER without my mom. She FREAKS out and expects the worst too. So I waited until I woke up this morning to tell her about that. She freaked out at first, but I got her to calm down; after all, my stepdad and stepbrother BOTH had to go to the ER yesterday with some stomach bug. Didn't want to get her even more worried about me when I had Mike to take care of me :D

Helped my grandma do some shopping today up near Cleveland. My grandma is so ... great, hehe. She made me some Macaroni and Cheese when we got back and I laid down in her living room and watched TV ... we used to live there when I was younger. Damn them, the stupid cable company switched around ALL the channels after them being the same for like 10 years! :evil:

But yeah, that's about it. Here's what I ate today ...

1 6-inch turkey sub on white w/lettuce
1 apple
1/2 chocolate chip cookie (a large one)
22 oz. Sierra Mist
4 Archway soft sugar cookies
Big friggin bowl of macaroni and cheese
1 1/2 cans of Minute Maid Orange pop
1 thing of orange gatorade

I gotta go back the past coupledays and update what I ate ... rats ... well so far today I've eaten a banana ... was planning on getting some McDonalds breakfast when we went to my grandma's up in Cleveland this morning, but my stepdad had a bad reaction to some Immodium AD I guess and my mom took him to the ER. Not that I'm annoyed if he's really sick, but they both tend to be hypochondriacs. :?

I was feeling pretty sluggish last night. I didn't drink any pop yesterday! :D I guess I'll put what I ate and drank yesterday here, while I'm at it.

Menu for 3/4:
3/4 bottle of orange gatorade
Large order of hash rounds from Burger King
Banana
Bottle or two of water
Grilled cheese

Menu for 3/5
1 1/2 bologna sandwiches on wheat bread
2/3 a 99 cent bag of BBQ chips
1/2 2 liter of Diet Coke
2 scrambled eggs
2 strips of bacon
2 pieces of toast w/strawberry jelly

Yeah, that's not much ... maybe that's why I was so tired :cry:

Later today is a gaming/anime night at Mike's ^.^ Lee, Cole, and Jerome (for a few hours) are gonna be there ... it's too bad his friend Nick couldn't make it, but he works at a hospital and is almost always at work. LIke 18 hour days, I think. Crazy motivation!

Bought a Family Feud DVD game last night at Wal-Mart to play tonight, but I tested it out and it sucks :cry: If we all hate it tonight, I'm taking it back. Not worth the $18 I paid for it -_-

Welp, not much else to say besides I am frigging starving. So I'll talk to y'all lata :idea:

Well yesterday was pretty fun. Worked, then Mike picked me up, got some Chinese, and just hung out at his house all night. Nothing in particular exciting, except he seemed to be a little more affectionate than normal. Around 2:30 am his mom said I could stay because I guess the roads were bad outside; I don't think they really were but I wasn't gonna argue with staying the night since I usually am not allowed. 8)

Unfortunately, we woke up about an hour ago and Mike was feeling really crummy. :cry: We laid around, he took his temperature, used the loo, but decided to bring me home since he felt like he might puke later, and he doesn't like people to see him sick. I know I'm just the opposite; I hate to be alone when I'm sick, but I can understand. He just looked so SAD and ill-feeling! :cry: I hope he feels better today instead of getting sick. I would've loved to stay and comfort him, but like he said, he doesn't like people to be around him when he's ill. I probably wouldn't have been able to see him puke without getting a little nauseous, but what are significant others for?

So I'm home a little earlier than usual. Haven't eaten anything today, although my stomach is telling me I shouldn't ... I didn't want to tell Mike I didn't feel good, but I think I'm a tad dehydrated; I do that easily. Didn't drink much last night so I'm chugging some water. My stomach gets all tense and ... to be blunt, gassy, when I get that way so .. I've been to the ER for dehydration before, no thanks, don't wanna do that again! I'll probably update later today. Ciao. :idea:

Ate today:
Bunch of water
1 medium Diet Coke from Burger King
3/4 Whopper Jr. w/mayo even though I asked for no mayo :evil:
1 medium fry
1 grilled cheese
Some gatorade

Well, after the other night's encounter with uh ... vomit, and my thoughts while I was feeling sick, I have decided to really adopt a new diet. I drink WAY too much Diet Coke, as in it's just about the only thing I drink. I eat fast food on average, 4 - 5 times a week, even if it's just a Happy Meal. Usually it's Burger King after work, two 5 piece chicken tenders and a medium fry. With a Diet Coke of course. And McDonalds is usually the cheeseburger Happy Meal, or a medium fry with the cheeseburger. And I eat way too much candy at work, considering that's the only food we sell. Gotta go all the way over to the health food store or to IGA if I want something healthy! :roll: Anyway, I decided to start eating better yesterday. I haven't had any Diet Coke since Sunday, which is really a feat for me. Yesterday I did have a couple bon bons, but besides that I ate pretty healthy. I'm not going to cut out all sugars and everything; my main goal is just to eat generally healthier. So, everyday in my blog, I'm going to keep track of what I eat. I'll update this page later tonight after I get home from work. I won't cut anything out, and I won't add anything if I didn't eat very much. So here goes nothing. And I'm not going to measure these things out - 1 bowl is just like a regular old cereal bowl.

I've eaten/drank today (3/1):
- 1 bowl of marshmallow matey's cereal (Lucky Charms rip off)
- 1 plate/bowl thing of salad (lettuce, some red things) with Italian dressing
- A lot of water
- 1 glass of 2% milk
- 1 meatball sub
- 5 mozzerella sticks
- 1 can of Diet Coke

I'm not going to exercise today because I've got work in a little bit and I've got some mild cramps ... but wish me luck! I'm really excited about how good I could look by the summertime. And we've got Hawaii next winter and by then I should be down a lot! Also, my current height/weight: I'm between 5'6 and 5'7, and weigh ... ::sigh:: 150-155 depending on the day. Yep ... blah I hate that. But I always told myself if I went over 160, that's where I would draw the line. My healthy weight would be about 135 - 140. So I don't have a whole lot to lose. Mike does a lot of summer outdoors-y stuff, so I know he'll get me more active. Ciao! Gotta go to work. :idea: